We are constantly told in today's times to quiet our egos and operate with the humility of a life long learner. That is so true, but for most women that I've encountered its actually a piece of advice that was curated for white men. So what's next for corporate black women?
While we ought not fall victim to the "ego" problem and while we are certainly not exempt.
The male ego has been the motivating force to intercept this problem with positive, proactive and beneficial training to reduce in grandiosity and increase in humility their natural state of being. That looks a lot like listening to people of other cultures, genders, races as equal contributors. But let's take that a step further, it also looks like honoring the nurse with the same respect as the doctor. Honoring the administrator with the same respect as the executive. Listening intently to the coordinator, not just the president.
It may not be the skin color but the position that you don't respect but in a not yet post-racial society the racism is exhibited behaviorally regardless. The corporate American organization chart has a power structure that looks a lot like a plantation did. Owner, overseer, worker.
As such a lot of the self-development help and rules curated for corporate black women is completely useless to us. Its elementary, my dear Watson.
Black women as a whole don't need the same training. We are community driven, no one cares about people and does the work of actively protecting people than black women. So what is the advice for us? We need humility sure, but that is not a seasoning we lack.
The answer is confidence. REAL confidence.
I love the definition of confidence I came across while mindlessly scrolling through Insta (if anyone finds the originator of the quote please comment below). She stated: The core word in confidence is confide. What does confide mean? It means to place your trust in something or someone. With confidence, you are simply trusting yourself. Knowing yourself and trusting yourself are skills that sharpen the knife in the toolkit of black womanhood.
The best part? We don't have to stop operating in humility. We don't have to become boisterous and grandiose. We can still level out the stillness of confidence with the peace of humility. Can I get an AMEN for confident black women. The artists who've perfected their craft and enjoy sharing their light with the world. Because that's what we do, we light up the world.